Column: Armageddon in Aisles 13-17

One of my many “mini-jobs” at the Institute is to help hand out media credentials at our events. I’m a bit of a hard ass when it comes to granting press passes. I’m on guard against certain types of reporters who, whenever they bother to peek into our little corner of marketing, always opt for the “How stores get you to buy things you don’t want” angle.The related, more 2017-ish version is the “How marketers spy on you” storyline. This one is in wide distribution nowadays. I wish I had a Krugerrand for every time I’ve been warned that an Alexa-enabled Echo unit lets Amazon listen to everything in your house. It doesn’t – and even if it did, the most interesting thing they’d hear is that my dog, Leo, snores louder than I do. But misinformation – and, oh lord, an “alternate fact” – travels even faster than outright lies. So if I suspect that some blogger wants to turn one of our practical seminars on geo-fencing into lurid click-bait about cyber-stalking, I give him the old, “There’s no room at the inn.”For similar reasons, I also keep an eye on industry-related books. Here’s a real beauty from the Yale University Press that hit the market in mid-January: “The Aisles Have Eyes: How Retailers Track Your Shopping, Strip Your Privacy, and Define Your Power” by Joseph Turow. Gee gosh golly – I wonder if he’s pro or con? It’s an interesting read although a bit padded with history like: 1974, Juicy Fruit, first item scanned at checkout. But there is one great big eye-opener, and it’s on the book’s very first page. At a 2015 industry conference, an analytics expert named Brandon Fischer made some predictions that Turow seizes upon: “… by 2028 half of Americans (and by 2054 nearly all Americans) will carry in their bodies device implants that communicate with retailers as they walk down the aisles and inspect various items.“Based on how long you hold an item the retailer’s computers will tell whether or not you like it. “Other signals from the implant will indicate whether you are nervous or cautious when you look at the price of the product you are holding. The analysis may lead, Fischer suggested, to a conclusion that a discount on the product may reduce your nervousness and lead you to purchase it. “His argument was a blunt, optimistic case for biometric monitoring in stores.”Yes, we’ve all seen the “Minority Report” clip where Tom Cruise walks past a display that recognizes him with, “Welcome back to the Gap! How did those assorted tank-tops work out for you?” But that still seemed as far off as flying-car traffic jams and “Star Trek” food replicators. I reached out to Fischer, now director of analytics & insights at MEC, to see if maybe he was spoofing us just a bit, and haven’t heard back. But guess what? He’s really on to something. Implants already are more commonplace than most of us realize – think cosmetic surgery, dental crowns, pacemakers, stents, IUDs and subcutaneous drug delivery devices. But now “bio-hacking” seems to be catching on as the next level up for the hardcore tattooing/body-piercing/steampunk crowd, particularly in Australia, for some reason. People have started to embed microchips (glass capsules the size of rice grains) into their hands so they unlock doors and turn on lights with just a wave. Electronic tattoos and “biostamps” can monitor your heart rate, hydration and temperature. Subdermal RFID chips can hold your health records and contact data. (Hey, my dog Leo has one of those, too!) And if that wasn’t weird enough for you, there are reports that some religious groups are now targeting the websites of implant enthusiasts because they see this as the fulfillment of the “Mark of the Beast.” Under this biblical prophecy (Revelation 13:17), eventually everyone will require a mark on their right hand or forehead in order to buy or sell anything. Yikes. However, as much as Mr. Turow tries to be the alarmist, even he concedes that the retail industry’s ability to invade privacy is far from monolithic – or even just well-coordinated – right now. He quotes one expert who describes Macy’s (but it’s applicable to the entire industry as well) as being “willing to try any ideas or concepts that come into vogue. But they are far less organic about it than they would have you believe.” He also describes Macy’s industry-first “omnichannel officer” as being “an honorary position with no specific responsibilities and no real leverage within the company.”Still, remember when the creepiest technology you’d encounter was that one nerd on the subway wearing Google Glasses? Good ol’ 2013 – such a kinder, gentler, simpler time.

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